Transitions...... OR Change is the only constant!

I have believed for a long time that the reason I was so stuck in perfectionism for so many years was because I didn't understand the nature of change.  I wanted things to be ordered, perfect and the way they were "supposed" to be.  It took years of frustration, fighting and finally, infertility to get it through my head that nothing is constant and Jon Kabat-Zin's "You can't fight the waves, but you can learn to surf" was the mantra I needed to start to understand the grip stress had on my life. 

Flash forward a couple of decades and people who know me now are astonished when I share stories of the perfectionism, control issues and anger I have left behind.  I finally know that there is perfection in imperfection and that being grateful for things as they are without trying to change them allows them to bloom and grow forever (like eidelweiss). :)

SO, here we are, on May 20, 2015. Both of my kids are home from college, my son has finished his Master's at Purdue and has a job waiting for him in the Big Apple in a month.  Last night, he proposed to his girlfriend of 7 years and we are all pretty blissed out today.  Welcome to our family, dear one!

My daughter finished her freshman year 1000 miles away and drove herself and her roomate home over the weekend.  Talk about synchronicity - we have always taken our car in for a trip check, oil change, etc. before we travel.  She took that life lesson ingrained from infancy and took her truck in for a check.  It turned out that the u-joints and drive train needed to be replaced - they would not have made it home without a major accident. TYJ!  THEN, she had to wait a day for the part they ordered to come in. Guess what? They ordered the wrong part and the right one was going to come in the next (next) day. So they had to delay their departure by a day. A minor inconvenience, they were able to work out an extra night stay at the dorm and had a friend help them get their stuff to the storage unit that they now couldn't get to with the truck "sick". All good, right? WELL, thank the Lord, Universe, Force, Guardian Angels - whichever names you associate with our benevolent, merciful Creator - the day they were supposed to leave (Friday) ended up being a horrible weather day - tornadoes, violent thunderstorms, flooding - just awful. They would have had to drive through that and who knows what they would have encountered. They came home Sat/Sun instead, didn't have a drop of rain and made it home in good time.  What looked like a major inconvenience ended up being a blessing of protection and safety.

So for me, viewing these changes with a grateful heart and a calmer mind was another gift to see how far I've come in my journey. I stayed Present, Practiced detachment and breathing, and noted my Progress with gratitude for how far I've come. Baby steps have actually brought me a long way - I now view transitions as the part of life that keeps things interesting and allow them to draw me into mindful reflection of my many blessings. 

Practice for today: 
Take a moment to look out the window, ground yourself in the PRESENT moment. PRACTICE slowing down your breathing - Andrew Weil's In 4 - hold 7 - out 8 - (4 times) is always wonderful for calming and grounding. Notice the PROGRESS you are making learning to stop, breathe, think.  I have attached a great stoplight graphic that I use in my classes as a reminder that your P3 is always up to you to use whenever you need it.

if Anderson Cooper does it...

Well, we all get to where we are on our path when we are supposed to. It's just that when Anderson Cooper gets there, it becomes mainstream, which is a good thing!  Last night, Anderson did a story on 60 minutes about mindfulness. I admit, at first felt a little concern that he was not going to to give it the importance it deserved, or talk to the people who really know what it is.  Thanks for coming through Anderson! 

He spoke to the master, my guru and the man I consider the penultimate authority on mindfulness in the Western world, Jon Kabat Zinn.  He has been bringing mindfulness to us for 40 years and NOW:
  

• Google has a full time person who leads mindfulness and stress management,
• Congress has an Ohio rep bringing it to the staffers and people on the hill and 
• they've made 60 minutes.  (Ego moment:) I was so ahead of my time!!  

Have Meditation, Will Travel has been around since 2004.  It is my Reiki practice, meditation/mindfulness coaching and stress management education company. But you shouldn't try to start a company - even when you know it's the next BIG THING - if you don't have the time to devote to it.  I split my time between my GED teaching, then went full time with that and decided that HMWT had to be a hobby, because it just wasn't going to pay me enough to get my kids through college with a minimum of debt on the other side.  So I back-burnered it and mindfulness, stress management and meditation took off without me. 

But what is it I really want it to be? In my mission statement, I say, "... full service stress management and relaxation [need to change that!] education company.  Classes are offered to teach and maintain a stress management, meditation or relaxation practice for women, couples, families, teens, ministry teams, organizational departments or anyone else who experiences stress in their life.  Workshop lengths vary from one hour to a two-day retreat and include presentation and practice of a variety of stress management, meditation and quiet prayer strategies and techniques (Have Meditation). Sessions can be set-up in a variety of locations (Will Travel) including private homes, offices, churches and community venues."  See what I mean about ahead of my time????

So, I'm really happy that 60 minutes did this story. I'm really happy that Anderson is finding his bliss and I'm glad Jon Kabat-Zinn got the credit for beginning the movement. But, (you knew there was a but coming didn't you?) the fact that I've been using this with my students in the jail classes and Lakeshore classes and adult basic education world for years does rankle the ego a bit - OK, more than a bit, I'm human!  So my journey will be to accept that if it's infinite, there's room for everyone to take part and if I really want it, I have to work for it, it's not just going to happen.  I am the Lake County, IL Google person who runs meditation/stress management classes for a big company (Like Abbott), I'm just biding my time while I finish my soul work to get there...

I am going to email the congressman about MindUP, the Goldie Hawn foundation program that's been in schools for a LONG time already.  Don't want them spending my tax dollars to reinvent the wheel!